Wednesday, June 02, 2010
Nevada Politician Strutting Like Free Range Hen
CARSON CITY, NEVADA - Nevada’s new Poultry Party is promising “a chicken in every pot” and the elimination of the Department of Agriculture among other government agencies. Headed by U.S. Senate Candidate Sue Lowden, the Party promises to clean the legislative slate of the past 100 years and get back to the basics.
“We need neither a government health insurance plan nor private health insurance,” insists Lowden. “If you can’t pay your medical bills then bring your doctor a chicken like in the old days,” she says. She also claims that Social Security and Medicare “are for the birds,” and threatens the male leaders in Washington with “a little hen pecking” over this issue.
Militant Poultry Party members boast they are not afraid to ruffle a few feathers in Congress. Armed with angry cocks they plan to fight for their beliefs in Washington circles.
State Republican voters appear to have a visceral reaction to the Party’s platform. The gutting of the American social system seems appealing to Nevadans who can barely scratch out a living.
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, fighting for his political life in Nevada, says he will not stick his neck out and take on the “chickenshits” of the extreme right. “Let the poultry folks run their wing-ding campaign with their half-baked ideas and end up with egg on their faces,” says Reid. “I will fly above it all. And if asked, I will say I have no beef with the Poultry Party.”
Other targets of the two-legged party include the IRS and Department of Education. “Let’s put an end to all taxation,” Lowden insists. “If the government doesn’t have any money they can’t interfere with our lives or the education of our children. Let no chickens, I mean children, be left behind.”
The queen of Chicken-a-la-king is being challenged by a member of the Republican Tea Party in the primary. Lowden admits the Poultry Party may get its goose cooked in the general election but the far right, evangelical, teetotaler folks, she predicts will choke on their own nutty fruitcakes.”
Nevada gamblers are not betting on the outcome of either the Republican primary race or the general election. They’ve turned a deaf ear to all the political squawking. The only sure bet is that people threatening to go to the polls in rubber chicken costumes will be banned within 100 yards.
Nevada Republicans appear to have been cooped up for too long. After the election they may simply have to eat crow. Or as one political analyst said, “a bird in hand is worth two in the bush.”
“We need neither a government health insurance plan nor private health insurance,” insists Lowden. “If you can’t pay your medical bills then bring your doctor a chicken like in the old days,” she says. She also claims that Social Security and Medicare “are for the birds,” and threatens the male leaders in Washington with “a little hen pecking” over this issue.
Militant Poultry Party members boast they are not afraid to ruffle a few feathers in Congress. Armed with angry cocks they plan to fight for their beliefs in Washington circles.
State Republican voters appear to have a visceral reaction to the Party’s platform. The gutting of the American social system seems appealing to Nevadans who can barely scratch out a living.
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, fighting for his political life in Nevada, says he will not stick his neck out and take on the “chickenshits” of the extreme right. “Let the poultry folks run their wing-ding campaign with their half-baked ideas and end up with egg on their faces,” says Reid. “I will fly above it all. And if asked, I will say I have no beef with the Poultry Party.”
Other targets of the two-legged party include the IRS and Department of Education. “Let’s put an end to all taxation,” Lowden insists. “If the government doesn’t have any money they can’t interfere with our lives or the education of our children. Let no chickens, I mean children, be left behind.”
The queen of Chicken-a-la-king is being challenged by a member of the Republican Tea Party in the primary. Lowden admits the Poultry Party may get its goose cooked in the general election but the far right, evangelical, teetotaler folks, she predicts will choke on their own nutty fruitcakes.”
Nevada gamblers are not betting on the outcome of either the Republican primary race or the general election. They’ve turned a deaf ear to all the political squawking. The only sure bet is that people threatening to go to the polls in rubber chicken costumes will be banned within 100 yards.
Nevada Republicans appear to have been cooped up for too long. After the election they may simply have to eat crow. Or as one political analyst said, “a bird in hand is worth two in the bush.”
