Friday, June 18, 2010
“Don’t Blame BP, They’re My Cup Of Tea”
WASHINGTON - Texas Representative Bill Barton apologized to BP CEO Tony Hayward for the “$20 billion shakedown” he experienced at the White House to pay oil spill claims. “Accidents happen,” said Barton, “and that’s not the time to victimize a well-meaning company experiencing the loss of life and profits.”
Barton compared the worst oil spill in the country’s history to a child spilling a glass of milk. “You don’t slap the kid across the face and send him to his room. A good parent will clean up the mess and tell the child to be more careful next time,” he said. “Our government needs to be a good parent.”
When questioned about the loss of jobs and businesses along the Gulf Coast, Barton pointed out the risky nature of small businesses and said the owners need to “go with the flow.” Demanding compensation from a company with deep pockets because of an oil spill is no different from someone suing McDonalds for burns they received from spilling hot coffee on themselves, he said.
“Everyone wants to blame a big company -- a car manufacturer, food processer, or mining operator – for some problem or accident so they can collect a big check, claimed Barton. “No one wants to work any more because suing, they think, is easier and more profitable.”
“BP’s first obligation is to its investors,” Barton explained. “They will certainly help pay for the cleanup but they should not put money into the hands of “lawyers and opportunists.” He went on to say that we live in a capitalist society where business interests come first and not a third world country rife with beggars, thieves and corrupt politicians.
Barton insisted that all the anger against BP is misdirected. He suggested refocusing that anger at abortion doctors, gay marriage advocates, and environmentalists. “These folks blend into our Christian society like oil and water,” he noted. “Our government should be deporting them to some socialist country and letting big oil drill, baby, drill.”
Tea Party spokesperson Sarah Palin hailed Barton as a true red-blooded American for “having the balls” to support BP when it’s down. “If it’s a choice between fishing, the environment or oil there really is no choice,” she said. “Oil is America’s best friend and there’s nothing like a three-mile oil slick to give a girl a big turn-on.”
Barton and Palin announced the formation of the Republicans for Big Oil Committee. They will be working on legislation that will exempt oil companies operating in U.S. waters from any liability. “It’s not in their best interest to allow oil to escape into the ocean,” Barton pointed out. “Just like the kid who spills his milk. It’s in his best interest to be careful. He can’t count on a refill and may have to eat his dry cookies plain.”
Barton compared the worst oil spill in the country’s history to a child spilling a glass of milk. “You don’t slap the kid across the face and send him to his room. A good parent will clean up the mess and tell the child to be more careful next time,” he said. “Our government needs to be a good parent.”
When questioned about the loss of jobs and businesses along the Gulf Coast, Barton pointed out the risky nature of small businesses and said the owners need to “go with the flow.” Demanding compensation from a company with deep pockets because of an oil spill is no different from someone suing McDonalds for burns they received from spilling hot coffee on themselves, he said.
“Everyone wants to blame a big company -- a car manufacturer, food processer, or mining operator – for some problem or accident so they can collect a big check, claimed Barton. “No one wants to work any more because suing, they think, is easier and more profitable.”
“BP’s first obligation is to its investors,” Barton explained. “They will certainly help pay for the cleanup but they should not put money into the hands of “lawyers and opportunists.” He went on to say that we live in a capitalist society where business interests come first and not a third world country rife with beggars, thieves and corrupt politicians.
Barton insisted that all the anger against BP is misdirected. He suggested refocusing that anger at abortion doctors, gay marriage advocates, and environmentalists. “These folks blend into our Christian society like oil and water,” he noted. “Our government should be deporting them to some socialist country and letting big oil drill, baby, drill.”
Tea Party spokesperson Sarah Palin hailed Barton as a true red-blooded American for “having the balls” to support BP when it’s down. “If it’s a choice between fishing, the environment or oil there really is no choice,” she said. “Oil is America’s best friend and there’s nothing like a three-mile oil slick to give a girl a big turn-on.”
Barton and Palin announced the formation of the Republicans for Big Oil Committee. They will be working on legislation that will exempt oil companies operating in U.S. waters from any liability. “It’s not in their best interest to allow oil to escape into the ocean,” Barton pointed out. “Just like the kid who spills his milk. It’s in his best interest to be careful. He can’t count on a refill and may have to eat his dry cookies plain.”
