Monday, October 31, 2011
O’Reilly and Cain Spar on Fox News Interview
Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly taped an interview with Republican Presidential Nominee Herman Cain for later broadcast. Cheaters and Liars obtained a transcript and the following are excerpts from that interview.
O’Reilly: People are referring to your meteoric rise in the Republican Party as a Cain Mutiny. Are you comfortable with that comparison.
Cain: Yea, I saw that film on TV. Bogart was a cool cat but he got the same lousy treatment like Nixon. I’m OK with Cain Mutiny.
O’Reilly: Your proposed 9-9-9 tax plan is credited in part for your winning the nomination. How did you develop this innovative idea?
Cain: It was as easy as making a pizza, Bill. A pizza has nine ingredients, takes nine minutes to prepare, and bakes for nine minutes. It’s as simple as that.
O’Reilly: That’s ingenious, Herman. Do all your ideas flow from your food-related jobs at Godfather’s Pizza, Burger King and Pillsbury?
Cain: Solving food problems is just like solving any other problems. You just exchange the words mozzarella, beef, and flour, as an example, for deficit, income, and cost cutting and the solution comes out like a tasty new recipe.
O’Reilly: In relation to food, do you think we can stimulate economic growth through temporary incentives?
Cain: The economy is like harvesting food from the garden. Growth has its seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter. We welcome the inevitable seasons of nature but we are upset by the seasons of our economy. Yes, there will be growth in the spring.
O’Reilly: I musty admit that is one of the most refreshing, optimistic statements I’ve heard in a very long time. Where did you get this idea?
Cain: I was influenced by the character Peter Sellers played in the movie Being There. He was an inspiration.
O’Reilly: You have proposed building a 20-foot wall with electrified barbed wire on the top and a moat with alligators between the U.S. and Mexico to solve the illegal immigration problem. Were you serious?
Cain: And then I said the plan would fatten the alligators, we would sell the skins to Italy, and they could export alligator shoes to Mexico -- great for the world economy. Can’t anybody take a joke?
O’Reilly: Commentators and pundits are saying that race will not be an issue in this campaign as both candidates are black. In terms of race, how do you differentiate yourself from President Obama?
Cain: You can say I’m like a perfect char-broiled burger, black on the outside and a red-blooded American on the inside. Obama is just plain well done.
O’ Reilly: Thank you President Cain. I and the entire Fox News team give you an unqualified endorsement.
O’Reilly: People are referring to your meteoric rise in the Republican Party as a Cain Mutiny. Are you comfortable with that comparison.
Cain: Yea, I saw that film on TV. Bogart was a cool cat but he got the same lousy treatment like Nixon. I’m OK with Cain Mutiny.
O’Reilly: Your proposed 9-9-9 tax plan is credited in part for your winning the nomination. How did you develop this innovative idea?
Cain: It was as easy as making a pizza, Bill. A pizza has nine ingredients, takes nine minutes to prepare, and bakes for nine minutes. It’s as simple as that.
O’Reilly: That’s ingenious, Herman. Do all your ideas flow from your food-related jobs at Godfather’s Pizza, Burger King and Pillsbury?
Cain: Solving food problems is just like solving any other problems. You just exchange the words mozzarella, beef, and flour, as an example, for deficit, income, and cost cutting and the solution comes out like a tasty new recipe.
O’Reilly: In relation to food, do you think we can stimulate economic growth through temporary incentives?
Cain: The economy is like harvesting food from the garden. Growth has its seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter. We welcome the inevitable seasons of nature but we are upset by the seasons of our economy. Yes, there will be growth in the spring.
O’Reilly: I musty admit that is one of the most refreshing, optimistic statements I’ve heard in a very long time. Where did you get this idea?
Cain: I was influenced by the character Peter Sellers played in the movie Being There. He was an inspiration.
O’Reilly: You have proposed building a 20-foot wall with electrified barbed wire on the top and a moat with alligators between the U.S. and Mexico to solve the illegal immigration problem. Were you serious?
Cain: And then I said the plan would fatten the alligators, we would sell the skins to Italy, and they could export alligator shoes to Mexico -- great for the world economy. Can’t anybody take a joke?
O’Reilly: Commentators and pundits are saying that race will not be an issue in this campaign as both candidates are black. In terms of race, how do you differentiate yourself from President Obama?
Cain: You can say I’m like a perfect char-broiled burger, black on the outside and a red-blooded American on the inside. Obama is just plain well done.
O’ Reilly: Thank you President Cain. I and the entire Fox News team give you an unqualified endorsement.
